So. This exists.

I have yet to be able to wrap my head around the existence of Mountain Dew Cake. It’s been hours since I first learned of such a travesty, and I’m still stuck.

Bacon vodka. I can handle that.

Jimmy Dean Chocolate Chip Pancake-Wrapped Sausage On A Stick, I can laugh at that.

Mountain Dew Cake is beyond my ability to comprehend. Part of me is thinking some variation of “only in America” (which is not a compliment to my country, I have to say), and the rest of me is thinking “NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.”

And some little part of me wonders if this was originally a Sandra Lee recipe, because it does sound pretty Semi-Ho. If only there were an accompanying Mountain Dew/coconut rum cocktail.